Choosing college tips for parents of soon-to-be freshman?
Posted by ParentHelper | Posted in Parenting | Posted on 21-03-2010-05-2008
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It will soon be time to help my son choose a college. I would appreciate any tips from "veteran" parents (or college students past or present) and also on creative financing, grants, etc. I'm starting early to try to be as informed as I can. Thanks!
By: itz me
About the Author:
By: itz me
About the Author:
This is a tip regarding your sons’ major.
I am not a parent, but I am a soon-to-be-graduated college student. Do NOT, under any circumstances, force your son to study a particular major or go to a particular college. Let HIM DECIDE. This is his future and part of growing up is making his own decisions.
If he wants to study 18th-Century Art History, let him. Regardless of major, he can still go on to do an MBA, a law degree, or a PhD, or go to teacher’s college, etc., so it’s not like if he studies something “impractical” he’ll be poor for life.
My best advice is to attend the open house/information/tour days that schools usually offer. It will give both of you a chance to see the campus and decide how comfortable it feels.
The more prestigious of two schools may not automatically be the better choice; if your son won’t feel comfortable there then it is probably better to choose the other school. 4 years is a long time to live somewhere you ****.
Your son needs to find schools that fit him well, both in terms of academics and in other ways. You can use college search engines like those found on, and on the Princeton Review site, to come up with a list of possibles based on his preferences and on his SAT/GPA, etc. That can be a good place to start.
When applying to colleges, if finances are a concern, consider doing the following: apply to a good mix of less expensive and expensive schools. After all, the sticker price on a school is rarely what you actually pay, and you won’t know what he’ll really have to pay, and what the balance is between loans and grants/scholarships, until after he applies, is accepted, and gets the financial aid offers. Sometimes, expensive private schools with high sticker prices can surprise you re: what they offer in terms of aid, so it’s smart to apply to both inexpensive schools (like good state unis in your home state) and expensive private schools. In general, he’ll get the worst aid from public universities located in states he’s not a resident of. Not that he should rule those out, but he should be aware.
And some schools have a history of offering *amazing* aid. Places like Grinnell, Kenyon, Pitzer, Harvard, etc. look extremely expensive re: sticker price, but might not be after aid is calculated. If he’s got the academics for schools at that level, he may want to apply.
Lastly, it can sometimes pay to apply to at least one or two “backup” schools, not only because they act as backups in case he doesn’t get in elsewhere, but also because sometimes those schools will offer aid to entice students with higher than average SATs and GPA to attend.
In general, when he picks schools to apply to, he should apply to a couple of reach schools, where his SATs and/or GPA is a bit low re: their averages; some fits, where his stats are right in their ranges; and some backups, where his stats are a bit on the high side of their averages.
Be very aware of application deadlines, both for colleges and for the FAFSA, which is the form you use to apply for financial aid.
He shouldn’t go into the SAT cold. He should prep. he’ll score better if he preps. At minimum, he needs to do one sample, full length, real past SAT exam, as if he was taking it in real life: timed, with one break, etc. This will get him familiar with the pacing and the types of questions asked on the exam. Ideally, he should get a SAT prep book, or take a class (the book is fine, or an inexpensive class at his high school is also good – no need to pay $$$$ for Princeton Review or Kaplan Test Prep classes.)
Lastly, let him drive this bus. You can guide him, offer him support, and even push him a bit, but he needs to be the one who picks the school. It needs to fit him (and fit *your* finances), but if you went to Grinnell, and he hates Grinnell, he should *not* go to Grinnell no matter how much you loved it.
Choosing a school:
I applied to five undergraduate schools. Three were in-state (one a public Ivy) and two out of state colleges. The criterion that I took into account when I was accepted into all five was:
1. In-state v. Out of state costs
Naturally you want to stay in state or in an area that has reciprocity so that you can get the most bang for your buck. However, if that is not an option, then you have to look at whether or not the school is public or private, has scholarship and work study opportunities.
2. Location, Location, Location
I come from a smaller suburban area and I like to be near a major city without any of the hassle. This is my personal comfort zone. So when choosing a school for your son make sure that he takes this into consideration. Being in a major city is hard for some students and adjusting to basic life on campus is hard enough without that. Also take into consideration (especially when you start to visit campuses) the bus systems (are they public buses or private), if he can have a car on campus, if it’s mandatory that he live in the dorms and what on-campus housing costs in contrast to off-campus. The living conditions are a HUGE consideration because if he’s not getting to class or if you’re spending too much on his living arrangements you could see that explode in a huge way.
3. Major!
What does he want to do? Does he have a path? If not then you may want to encourage him to choose a school that is well known all together as opposed to known for only one thing. For example, I applied to UVA, a nationally known public Ivy. It has a broad balance of majors any one of which I could choose and prosper from, however, another choice of mine Old Dominion University has an awesome English department and is much smaller of a name. Choosing ODU for anything other than English may have been more difficult for me in the long run. Obviously UVA is just the better choice, but I digress.
Also, he will have to consider whether or not he wants to go to graduate school. In which case, he’d want to be more marketable to other universities after graduation. A GPA from UVA weighs more than one from ODU and hence that’s the better choice.
4. Costs
Taking that same example, ODU would have cost me next to nothing, but with UVA I had to pay at total of 12k after scholarships. While a free ride is always a good idea, the 12k honestly amounts to only about four years of moderate payments to the USDE. With that taken into consideration, and the fact that I could probably get a better job with a name like UVA, I saw it as an even field.
Now you want to know about funding. File a FAFSA form as soon as you get your W2s. You will need to put in your income information and your spouse’s. There are different types of loans and you’ll have to research those that are best for you, but I found that a Perkins loan was my fave. The interest is low, the payments are moderate, and deferment is possible without penalty. No matter what loan you choose you’ll have to file a FAFSA, and the sooner the better!
I have more, but I figure this is long enough. Good luck with it all!
Your part is financial: Be very clear on how much you can afford to contribute, and be upfront with that information. Make sure that your son understands what the financial parameters are, and discuss how much you are willing to help with student loans, etc. That will keep him from getting excited over colleges that are out of financial reach.
But, basically — this is HIS party, you’re only there as the caterer
He’s the one that will decide which colleges to apply to. Your job is to help him evaluate the different schools by taking him on visits, discuss what the schools offer that help him meet his career goals, etc. But otherwise, the applications are HIS job, the financial assistance applications are HIS job, and the choice is, ultimately, his.
I assume you mean he is going into high school, not college.
get the magazine Kaplan’s Newsweek How To Get Into College 2009. There are many books at the library to help you. Start visiting colleges early. I took my daughter to one sophomore year. and then many over junior year. It takes a lot of time to go on a visit. You can really get a feel for the campus. She determined early she wanted to go to a small college, and nothing in a big city, which narrowed down our search. By the end of junior year she knew her areas of study. When we went on our visits we made sure to schedule a meeting with professors in those areas.
Also your high school counselor should be able to help too.
I seemed to be aware of this already, nevertheless there are some useful bits that concluded the image to me, many thanks!