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There is nothing as exciting, fulfilling and joyful as becoming a parent for the first time. First time parenthood however, can also be fraught with tremendous stress brought about by anticipation, preparation and caring for a little creature who can’t tell you what he needs or wants. For people who have actively sought parenthood however, it is probably this additional aspect of stress and tension that makes parenthood such a wonderfully strengthening and humbling experience. For first time parents, a useful parenting resource is a must.

Since time immemorial, new parents could always have ready access to any parenting resource. They could either ask close relatives and friends for sound pieces of advice or they could look for other parenting resource traditional sources. The library or bookstore for example can have a good parenting resource or two lying around. Expectant parents usually read a parenting resource book or watch a parenting resource video or film. Many can attest that such methods have held some merit. This is especially so because most famous parenting resource materials that come out in print or film have been made by expert individuals who actually publish their credentials. Parents can also benefit from a bestseller parenting resource that is sure to contain effective information.

Recently however, with the arrival of the internet, parents can also choose to get a parenting resource online. The question is whether an online parenting resource is as good as traditional ones. The internet can offer a wealth of resources for a clueless parent. Aside from selling traditional resources online, one can also choose to use a parenting resource article or e-book. There are now also available support groups and blogs or forums were parents can interact and swap practical information. The good thing about the internet is that you can check on a parenting resource without having to go out of your way. You can stay in the comfort of your home and still be well advised or informed.

In a lot of cases, a parenting resource from the internet can truly dish out good and reliable information and tips. As with everything else however, one should be careful with an online parenting resource. It may be a generally good idea to take advice from seasoned parents in forums. You can also probably take some tips from articles and online parenting resource materials that are authored by experts. Be wary however of the parenting resource that has uncertain origins or that talk about such sensitive topics as child medication or treatment. You may be endangering your child if you take note of pieces of advice from ghost writers who may not actually know what they’re talking about or from internet entities masquerading as experts.

The best thing to do is to check the credentials or origin of your parenting resource. Try researching about the names of Dr. so and so and the applicability, effectiveness, disadvantages and side effects or suggested procedures or child raising strategies. If you are particularly interested in critical and serious areas of concern, try getting into web sites that carry a .org or .gov in its address. This is especially applicable for such concerns as child safety, treatment or grave physical or psychological problems.



By: Veronica Fisher

About the Author:

There is no denying that ********** parenthood is now a valid personal choice. Along with the increasing acceptance for homosexuality comes the increasing acceptance for ********** parenthood. It cannot be denied however that ********** parenthood still has a tremendous share of challenges. ********** parents may be in need of a good parenting article to help them through. The fact is, the practical parenting article for ********** parents is not that easy to come across. This is because the common parenting article for same *** parents may involve in varying degrees a history of homosexuality, current views on homosexuality and experiential accounts. What is a parenting article for ********** parents trying to tell us?

While a good parenting article should include some practical tips, a parenting article for ********** parents should also include a lot of other things. This is because a parenting article for ********** parents should also show the reality of how homosexuality is accepted in today’s society. Yes, your parenting article may tell you that many people are now accepting homosexuality and same *** parenthood as a valid way of life. On the other hand each and every parenting article for ********** parents also tells you that homosexuality is still very much a controversial issue.

Your typical parenting article will tell you for example that among some higher ranking government officials, the concept of same *** marriage and parenthood is still not accepted. Your parenting article will also tell you that many other religious institutions, social groups and individuals merely diplomatically couch their words of disagreement and criticism. You will also be told that bullying in schools of children of same *** parents is still very much a reality. Why do ********** parents need to know about all this?

A parenting article for ********** parents should be able to inform parents of the present truths about homosexuality and how children of ********** parents are actually treated. Such knowledge can better prepare ********** parents for the unique challenges of ********** parenthood. How can kids for example be taught confidence if they are derided in school? How can you expect your child to accept and understand your chosen way of life if his outside social environment is telling him not to?

A good parenting article therefore for ********** parents should look into realities first before anything else to educate same *** parents. On a more positive light, a parenting article may also show the actual optimistic truths about ********** parenthood. Reading in a parenting article about the good aspects of ********** parenthood is both encouraging for ********** parents and a way for them to educate their children about their family situation.

It is for example positively enlightening to know that according to studies, same *** parents are also capable of rearing healthy, normal and socially functional children. Many children of homosexuals are also able to develop meaningful relationships with people around them. Articles for ********** parents should therefore invariably educate and encourage. Parenting articles for ********** parents show the uncolored truth about ********** parenthood, with all its parental joys and challenges.



By: Veronica Fisher

About the Author:

All parents need a good parenting resource of their own. Since parenting is such a tough occupation a parenting resource can help make things easier for any parent. How and where can a parent find a relevant parenting resource? There is no one sure and perfect parenting resource for everyone. A parent may have to determine for himself/herself which parenting resource is helpful and applicable. There are however specific areas where one can get a parenting resource. You can get your parenting resource from the following:

The Book and Video Haven

Any place where they sell or lend a vast selection of books and videos may be a parenting resource. You can go around looking for a bestseller parenting resource or something created by experts in the field of parenting and psychology to get a good parenting resource. Surprisingly, an experiential parenting resource account or even fictional stories of parenting may be useful parenting resource for the discriminating parent.

Comprehensive Sites and Links

Not surprisingly, the internet can have every kind of parenting resource imaginable. You have the option of checking out sites that will provide you with a comprehensive parenting resource section or one that will provide you with specific parenting resource information. You can also check link or .net sites if you want to have a brief overview of some other sites that may be good places for a parenting resource.

Message Boards and Others

You may prefer a parenting resource that’s highly practical and that comes from people who have actually experienced parenting. You can use parents’ forums and message boards as your parenting resource. In this kind of parenting resource you can swap stories and practical tips and information. A lot of parents may warm up to this kind of parenting resource because it is conversational, light and a fun way to go about talking about parenting.

Formal Classes and Support Groups

A clear and structured parenting resource may come from such formal areas as parenting courses and support groups. This type of

parenting resource will surely offer highly professional pieces of information. There is no doubt that if you enroll in a parenting resource class, you will get a load of theories and actual practice accounts from trained professionals in the field of parenting. Support groups can also offer parenting resource that may be both categorized as formal expert quality and personally supportive and uplifting in nature.

People You Know

A practical parenting resource source would be people you actually know. Your own parents, family, friends and colleagues may each be a parenting resource. Ask these live, actual parenting resource people what they can share based on what they know and their experience. This may be the cheapest and best parenting resource you can ever have.

However and wherever you choose to get your parenting resource make sure that your parenting resource is applicable to you and your family. Remember, not all families are the same.



By: Veronica Fisher

About the Author:

Basics Of Parenting

Today, the one and the only question that is in the minds of everybody is “where are the youth of this generation going?” as the lifestyle and values of the youth is bothering the society to say the least. Though the problems created by the youth and the problems faced by them are innumerable, it is not the state of affairs of the youth alone that is causing anxiety. The baby on its way into this world, new born babies and the children in different stages of growth also face and cause problems. While trying to find the root cause of the problem it is the parents who are blamed for it, most of the time. Though they are not the sole cause, they have a major role to play. Their success in parenting depends on the kind of parents they are, their environment, the support from the family, the possibility of getting trained for parent hood, the level of education, the nature of the child concerned etc.,. The problems, mostly psychological, would vanish with proper parenting. In the early days, people mostly lived in joint families. The experience and advice the young parents received from the elders, parents, aunts, grand parents, uncles, guided them in the process of parenting. The children also had many people to support them, to allow them to vent their feelings and to learn the probable ways of findings solutions to their problems.

True Story

While talking to a group of adolescent girls shocking messages came to light. Many of the adolescent girls were having illicit relationship with auto drivers with whom they were coming to school. Deeper analysis brought out the fact that these girls were longing for love from their parents. When an iota of love or something akin to it is shown by the auto driver, they easily fall a prey to the former’s devious designs; of course they suffer later when they find it difficult to extricate themselves from the driver’s clutches. Only the parents can help these children. One of the great, noble traits of parenthood is love and that alone can cure many ills faced by the children and youth. It can help the girls to retrieve themselves1.

In yet another instance, a 5 years old orphan boy in a care centre for the AIDS infected persons stunned the onlookers by saying that if his father had had proper parenting, he would not have gone astray and ended with AIDS, infecting his mother too2. Even this small lad knows the importance of parenthood. Everyone knows about parenting and follow the kind of parenting demonstrated by their parents or that which they have learnt through courses or training or advice given by psychologists or gurus.

Styles of Parenting:

Just as there are different types of human beings, there are different types of styles of parents. The parents’ style influences the level and kind of development of the child. Whatever may be the style of parenting the essentials to be looked into are, “Express your love, make your child feel secure. Build their self-esteem. Stay flexible and recognize the time for change as your child grows. Communicate openly and honestly and be confident in your own ability”3. When you talk to your child, you should be actually listening not just hearing.

There are different types of parenting, such as “Authoritative, Authoritarian, Permissive4”. Parents who are very clear about their role and give instructions with confidence can be considered as Authoritative. The Reader’s Digest Great Dictionary of the English language shows that authoritative means commanding and self confident, while authoritarian implies, favoring or enforcing strict obedience to authority5. It is similar to dictatorship.

Another variety of parenting is known as permissive. These parents allow their children to follow their own path, mostly non-interfering. It is similar to saying, “let the sleeping dogs lie” as they are. These parents do not want to follow any strict rules or take up much responsibility in bringing up their children. There is another mode of classifying the parents. According to this classification, there are three types of parents, such as Consultant, Helicopter, Dull Sergeants6.

Three Types of Parents



CONSULTANT



HELICOPTER



DRILL SERGEANT



This Love and Logic parent provides guidance and consultant services for children



This parent hovers over children and rescues them from the hostile world in which they live.



This parent commands and directs the lives of children.

1.

The Love and Logic parent provides messages of personal worth and strength

1.

provides messages of weakness and low personal worth

1.

provides messages of low personal worth and resistance

2.

The Love and Logic parent very seldom mentions responsibilities

2.

makes excuses for the child, but complains about mishandled responsibilities

2.

makes lots of demands and has lots of expectations about responsibility.

3.

The Love and Logic parent demonstrates how to take care of self and be responsible

3.

“takes on” the responsibility of the child

3.

tells the child how he /she should handle responsibility

4.

The Love and Logic parent shares personal feelings about own performance and responsibilities

4.

protects the child from any possible negative feelings

4.

tells the child how he / she should feel

5.

The Love and Logic parent provides and helps child explore alternatives and then allows child to make his / her own decision

5.

makes decisions for the child

5.

provides absolutes : “This is the decision you should make”.

6.

The Love and Logic parent provides “time frames” in which child may complete responsibilities

6.

provides no structure, but complaints, “After all I’ve done for you…”

6.

demands that jobs or responsibilities be done now

7.

The Love and Logic parent models doing a good job, finishing, cleaning up, feeling good about it.

7.

whines and uses guilt : “When are you ever going to learn. I always have to clean up after you.”

7.

issues orders and threats: “You get that room cleaned up or else…”

8.

The Love and Logic parent often asks self, “Who owns the problem?” helps the child explore solutions to his / her problem

8.

whines and complains about having an irresponsible child who causes “me” much work and responsibility

8.

takes over ownership of the problem using threats and orders to solve the problem

9.

The Love and Logic parent uses lots of actions, but very few words

9.

uses lots of words and actions that rescue or indicate that the child is not capable or responsible

9.

uses lots of harsh words, very few actions

10.

The Love and Logic parent allows child to experience life’s natural consequences and allows them to serve as the teacher

10.

protects child from natural consequences, uses guilt as the teacher

10.

uses punishment; pain and humiliation can serve as the teacher.

Source: http://www.loveandlogic.com/pdfs/threetypes.pdf

One way to identify the kind of parents is by analyzing the kind of gifts they give to their children in order to make them do any specific activity. Some parents have a survival mentality; they give their child “whatever” just to make them do the job. Some parents operate with a default mentality. They give their child what is popular without considering whether it will be the most helpful. In actual practice the parent should be operating deliberately and purposefully, giving the child what is useful after carefully thinking through. They are usually known as “intentional parents” 7. Depending on what kind or type of parents they are, the goals, and gifts also change. In the case of permissive parents, the guiding motive will be, “If I can just make it through the child – rearing years, I can get my life back”. Their goal will be “jilting the kids out of the house”. They follow the easiest method of doing whatever is easy to do. Hence, they use bribes, threats and use TV as a baby sitter8.

On the other hand, those “who want to give the child what will be best and most helpful for him”, will have the goal of preparing the child for life as a productive adult. They would spend quality time with the child, imparting ethical values to the child. The gifts given by such parents would be, “religious books, enjoyable pastimes, academics, home skills and chances for socialization” 9.

If a child is to be successful in life, the appropriate parental care is necessary. But, of course, there are children who grow up into successful adults, in spite of defective parenting. But such cases are very rare. The society at present is facing problems of parenting especially in the case of single parent, divorced parents, simple and extended families. Most of the children brought up by single parent and unmarried mothers, find it difficult to cope with the pressures in the family and society.

Parenting Skills:

With, hectic work schedule of the parents, the heavy load of learning coupled with many distractions and the problems faced by the society, the children are looking for the support of their parents for a secure life. It is ordinarily observed that parenting without proper foundation has always and indefinitely led to confusions in child development. What is essential is

Ø Developing and clarifying clear communicative expectations.

Ø Staying calm in the midst of turmoil

Ø Encouraging positive consequences and consistency.

Ø Being the role model to your child.

Ø Effective praising.10



To be a successful parent discipline is necessary. At the same time, there should be consistency in whatever the parents are saying and doing, parents should have a preplanned, pre-developed strategy to teach proper behaviour to the child. That is, both the parents,or the single parent should make their expectations clear to the child. , Both of them can sail smoothly while bringing up their child. They should be very specific and firm in teaching their children. Moreover, the parents must take into consideration the child’s age, ability, developmental status and the resources that are available for the family.11 Once the expectations are clearly stated, it is necessary that both the parents should communicate it to the child, without contradictions. In addition to these, there should be frequent family ‘get togethers’. Instead of punishing the child for not abiding by the expectations, it will be better to have discussions to clear the child’s doubts and parents being role models.

Ray Burke states that “Children can be sarcastic, defiant, rebellious and possibly violent, parents have to prepare themselves for times like these and learn to keep cool” 12. Yet another way to increase or encourage desirable behavior is to use positive consequences. What the parents should remember is to use the positive consequences that would work with the child. While developing a child’s behavior the parents should remember “consistency”. Consistency is the key to being a successful parent. This gives the message to the child that “your parents are reliable and serious”.

The most important aspect of successful parents is that the parents should be role model for their child 13. The parent should be a positive role model for their child to follow. As Ray Burke say, “Praise is powerful…. Praise is nourishment. It helps in the emotional development. It helps in building up self-esteem, belief of personal satisfaction, feeling of security.”14 The praise should be communicated to the child either verbally or through action.

Parenting Skills :

Ø Discipline

Ø Education

Ø Finance

With the social changes, the extended family that existed earlier, which played the vital role of a model, a shock absorber, a vent for relieving one’s feelings has become a thing of the past. Hence, the parents of the modern era have to learn creative ways of bringing up their children. It is found that the most important but controversial parenting skills is DISCIPLINE. Whether the method is, redirection, time-outs, loss of privileges, grounding, extra chores, or sparking, the parents should embrace their role to train their children to become moral and respectable adults15. The second skill to be acquired by the parents is regarding education. The parents should also be educating their children in moral values. The child’s education should take into consideration certain important facts16:

v Family’s financial status.

v Quality of local public and private schools.

v Level of parental education.

v Personalities of parents and children.

v Home schooling support and resources.

v The involvement of the parents in the child’s education.

Besides education, one of the important parenting skills is the effective way of dealing with financial issues. The demand for expenditure for rearing the child, medical, hygienic needs etc. are soaring high today. Hence, a successful parent should know what is essential and what is not before deciding upon the expenditure of the limited resources.

Conclusion

There is no doubt that children bring us much joy and much responsibility. Most of the stress and worry of bringing them up can be reduced or removed with proper, careful planning. The parents should plan when to have a child. The working mother, if she is to stay at home, once the child is born, should plan earlier to save as much as possible and cut down the family expenditure. Both the parents have to plan to set aside enough time to be with the child, not only when it is a baby, but till the child becomes an adult.

The parents, need not be only the problematic, should avail of training in parenting skill as much as possible. First of all, both parents should have a congenial and frank communication between them. Only then, once the child comes into the family, they will be able to communicate with the child easily. Further the “ego”, the concept of “I” should be relegated to the background. It is possible that the child becomes sick at times mildly, at times seriously. Both the parents should take responsibility of looking after the child, not blaming each other as the cause of sickness. The child rearing, though filled with difficulties, hurdles and events that test one’s tolerance, is undoubtedly a pleasure. It is a joy. A successful parent should know how to smile. That will reduce the stress and pain of the child. As it grows into adolescent stage, the skills of the parents should be developed further. They should know more about the physique, the psychology and mental development of the child.

It should be remembered that the requisites of an effective parent are dedication, attention, love and constant denial of easily administering swift punishment. Though parenting is time consuming, the fruits are very attractive. The future generation and its success depends on the effective, successful and cheerful parents of today to a great extent.

END NOTES

1. Author’s personal experience

2. Ibid.

3. http://www.raisingkids.co.uk 10.14.2008



http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/614981/authoritative_authoritarian_and_permissive.html

The Great Dictionary of English Language (Readers Digest Association Limited, London, 2003) p.56, 57

Three Types of Parents: Love and Logic institute – www.loveandlogic.com 1981.

http://intentionalparents.com/types-of-parents/ p.1

Ibid. p.2.

Ibid.p.2

http://allp



By: Shyamala Karunakarapandian

About the Author:

A Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) is a legal action that terminates all of a parents rights to make decisions for a child or to care for that child.

A Termination of Parental Rights may be voluntary or involuntary. All too often parents are pressured into relinquishing their rights based on allegations of abuse, neglect or abandonment. The consequences are significant and long lasting. A parent should never enter into such proceedings unrepresented. The result is often final.

Under Minnesota Statutes, a juvenile court may, upon petition, terminate ALL rights of a parent to a child. It may do so:



with the written consent of a parent who for good cause desires to terminate parental rights (Note: wishing to avoid a child support obligation is not "good cause);

if it finds that one or more of the following conditions exist:



that the parent has abandoned the child;

that the parent has substantially, continuously, or repeatedly refused or neglected to comply with the duties imposed upon that parent by the parent and child relationship, including but not limited to providing the child with necessary food, clothing, shelter, education, and other care and control necessary for the child's physical, mental, or emotional health and development, if the parent is physically and financially able, and either reasonable efforts by the social services agency have failed to correct the conditions that formed the basis of the petition or reasonable efforts would be futile and therefore unreasonable;

that a parent has been ordered to contribute to the support of the child or financially aid in the child's birth and has continuously failed to do so without good cause. This clause shall not be construed to state a grounds for termination of parental rights of a noncustodial parent if that parent has not been ordered to or cannot financially contribute to the support of the child or aid in the child's birth;

that a parent is palpably unfit to be a party to the parent and child relationship because of a consistent pattern of specific conduct before the child or of specific conditions directly relating to

the parent and child relationship either of which are determined by the court to be of a duration or nature that renders the parent unable, for the reasonably foreseeable future, to care appropriately for the ongoing physical, mental, or emotional needs of the child. It is presumed that a parent is palpably unfit to be a party to the parent and child relationship upon a showing that the parent's parental rights to one or more other children were involuntarily terminated or that the parent's custodial rights to another child have been involuntarily transferred to a relative under section 260C.201, Subd 11, paragraph (e), clause (1), or a similar law of another jurisdiction;

that following the child's placement out of the home, reasonable efforts, under the direction of the court, have failed to correct the conditions leading to the child's placement. It is presumed that reasonable efforts under this clause have failed upon a showing that:



(i) a child has resided out of the parental home under court order for a cumulative period of 12 months within the preceding 22 months. In the case of a child under age eight at the time the petition was filed alleging the child to be in need of protection or services, the presumption arises when the child has resided out of the parental home under court order for six months unless the parent has maintained regular contact with the child and the parent is complying with the out-of-home placement plan;

the court has approved the out-of-home placement plan required under section 260C.212 and filed with the court under section 260C.178;

conditions leading to the out-of-home placement have not been corrected. It is presumed that conditions leading to a child's out-of-home placement have not been corrected upon a showing that the parent or parents have not substantially complied with the court's orders and a reasonable case plan; and

reasonable efforts have been made by the social services agency to rehabilitate the

parent and reunite the family It should be noted that that parental right may be terminated prior to one year, or in the case of a child under age eight, prior to six months after a child has been placed out of the home.

It is also presumed that reasonable efforts have failed under this clause upon a showing that:



the parent has been diagnosed as chemically dependent by a professional certified to make the diagnosis;

the parent has been required by a case plan to participate in a chemical dependency treatment program;

the treatment programs offered to the parent were culturally, linguistically, and clinically appropriate;

the parent has either failed two or more times to successfully complete a treatment program or has refused at two or more separate meetings with a caseworker to participate in a treatment program; and

the parent continues to abuse chemicals.









that a child has experienced egregious harm in the parent's care which is of a nature, duration, or chronicity that indicates a lack of regard for the child's well-being, such that a reasonable person would believe it contrary to the best interest of the child or of any child to being in the parent's care;

that in the case of a child born to a mother who was not married to the child's father when the child was conceived nor when the child was born the person is not entitled to notice of an adoption hearing under section 259.49 and the person has not registered with the fathers' adoption registry under section 259.52;

that the child is neglected and in foster care; or

that the parent has been convicted of a crime listed in section 260.012, paragraph b,

clauses (1) to (3).



In an action involving an American Indian child, sections 260.751 to 260.835 and the Indian Child Welfare Act, United States Code, title 25, sections 1901 to 1923, control to the extent that the provisions of this section are inconsistent with those laws.





A termination of parental rights requires a high standard of proof and must be proven by clear and convincing evidence. Any person with knowledge of the circumstances may seek to terminate parental rights. The end result of a termination is that the all rights of the parent may be terminated but it does not extinguish that parents responsibility to pay any past balance for child support.



By: Maury D. Beaulier

About the Author:

According to Wikipedia, mono parents are parents without partners in raising a child or children. Thus, a mono parent is one who raises his or her bud solely and lonely, spouseless.

Illustrations on mono parents will be at variance from place to place. Each societal mannerism treats and classifies them to their accord.

Treatment of mono parents modify according to where they are put up. Mono parents in urban areas are dealt with in a more positive manner in contrast to those from rural areas.

Mono parenting has become a widespread scenario in today's lifestyle. But not all cultures receive this change in the way of living, with a positive outlook.

Mono parents- Their practicality

The mother or father is left to raise the bud, companionless, due to various causes and reasons.

They are singled out due to reasons like annulment, mutual separation (break-up), one of them is imprisoned or has kicked the bucket.

The so called parent, who raises the bud, is not necessary to be blood related to that bud. The DNA affirmation does not really count to classify him or her as a mono parent.

Parenting singly is a mere option opted by the person, if the bud is not his or her organic child. Opting to raise another person's bud is an aristocratic gesture.

As per the latest research, mono parents should get hold of their bud either legally or by adopting or by getting pregnant, unnaturally, or by becoming the surrogate mother.

Thus, mono parenting is a personal option, depending on one's own individuality. Bringing up a kid is a strenuous task and a costly affair, considering the present standard of living. Mono parenting might not always be successful.

In a few places, where the lifestyle of people is still passé, mono parents are regarded pariah. The reason is that, in those days, parenting children who are not born to them or raising a kid companionless, was considered as sin.

Mono parenting – Today's Fashion

Latest reports, taken in US, states that, on normal standards, thirty percent of the kids are raises in households of mono parents.

Parents, who are single, are dominantly mothers. The impact of mono parenting is more dawned upon mothers who are singled out. But, mono parents in fatherly figures, are also on a rise.

The male being a mono parent is a widespread scenario in Muslim dominated areas, due to the fact that they are yet to acknowledge the capability of a woman.

According to the 2002 poll taken in US, kids growing under the father's in charge was around ten plus five percent of parenthood. But this data has increased one tenth, over the decade.

Thus, its is inferred that in the 20th century, male gender shouldering the responsibility of raising a child was not prominent and such a scenario has changed adversely, as the lifestyle of people shifted.

Mono parenthood

Flow through the life, is what our living preaches us. Mono parenting has become a common gesture in our day to day life. Accept the change. Live the way you want.

Mono parenting, a sin, has become passé. The kids raised parents are not seen indifferently now. In fact, present regulations are in favor of such parents and children and the kids are protected from close minded people, by these legislations.

Nowadays, mono parenthood has become a part and parcel of the societal mannerisms. In fact, mono parents are acknowledged and appreciated for their strength of will and aristocratic gesture.



By: Abhishek Agarwal

About the Author:

ABSTRACT

The importance of parental involvement as an accelerating and motivating factor in their children’s education is a worldwide-accepted fact. This research project provides an in depth explanation along with specific reasons, the importance of parents’ involvement in their children’s education. It also discusses the parenting techniques, their types and their consequences if neglected. It also describes the ways to measure the outcome of the positive parental involvement. Furthermore, it mentions the teachers involvement and the difficulties faced by the teachers in getting parents involved in their children’s (this is further supported by the examples of two teachers who with their deliberate efforts won the parents over to devote their maximum attention towards their children), single-parent involvement, children’s own efforts to improve their academic levels and joint home-school based interventions. A detailed analysis of the different main ideas is given, based on the findings from other research surveys and projects.

INTRODUCTION:

Parental involvement can be seen to fall into three types: 1) Behavioral, 2) Intellectual and 3) Personal. The research explores the effect of multi-dimensional participation of parents and the resulting progress of children in their studies when different parental resources were dedicated to them. Actively participating parents help their children in their academic development by going to schools and participating in open houses. By keenly observing the behavior of their children they can rightly judge the kind of behavior or the allocation of resources required by their children. Such caring parents can also motivate teachers to become more attentive towards a particular student, thus maintaining the cycle of parent-teacher involvement. Encourage Building up cognitive and perception abilities in a child are a major concern in the upbringing of the child. The way the parents involve their children in cognitive learning is by exposing them to different cognitively stimulating activities and materials such as books, electronic media and current events at home. This helps the child to practice all sorts of language comprehending skills at the school. The results show a remarkably positive behavior at the school and with peers.

Two parenting processes namely the Supportive Parenting (SP) and Harsh Parenting (HP) helped a lot in the research of parental involvement in their children’s education. By adjusting the levels of supportive parenting, different levels of successful outcomes were observed. Supportive parenting in even kindergarten students yielded positive results. Four measures of supportive parenting were used in the study, they were:

1. Proactive teaching.

2. Calm discussion in disciplinary encounters.

3. Warmth.

4. Interest and involvement in peer activities.

The assessments were conducted when children entered kindergarten and when they reached grade 6. There was a factor noted to hinder children’s development: family adversity. It was the result of a multipurpose negative process that included the risk of low socio-economic status, single-parenting and family stress. Child maladjustments were found to be more common in families with such adversities. No matter how much negative impacts were cast, SP was found to overcome the risks associated with family adversity. SP was strongly related to adjustment procedures in grade 6 children who had single parent family or experienced low socio-economic status (SES) in their early childhood.

In a way to socialize their children, parents adopted the techniques of calm discussion and proactive teaching. They helped lessen the behavioral problems by carrying long discussions with their children, cultivating in them a sense of respect, calmness and peace of mind. Mothers also participated actively in reducing the peer stress among their children. It is also a widely accepted fact that supportive parenting plays an important role in the children’s development of empathy, prosocial behavior and emotional competence. On the negative side, the absence of supportive parenting may be related to the development of internal problems such as anxiety and depression.

Lack of the necessary parental care and attention is the main factor for the subsequent rise in the percentage of juvenile delinquency (crime among children). The absence of parental instructions causes children to develop irreversible behavioral and emotional problems. They in order to seek attention, resort to crimes thinking that in this way they could fulfill their wishes. They may revert to uncontrolled violence if not kept an eye upon. Such criminal activities cannot be brought to a halt until their distressing symptoms of low self-esteem, depression, dysphonic mood, tension and worries, and other disturbances are relieved. And the importance of parents’ role in this regard cannot be over-emphasized.

In an effort to describe parental involvement, many researchers use a term “Transition”(Lombardi, Joan). “Transition” is used to describe the time period in which children move from home to school, from school to after school activities, from one activity to another within a pre-school, or from pre-school to kindergarten. The untiring endeavors of teachers in the phenomenon of transition cannot be ignored. They prepared the children and their parents to face the problems of adjusting to elementary school programs that had different psychology, teaching styles and structure than the programs offered at the kindergarten level. In the elementary level schools the teachers had to face serious challenges in motivating the parents to take interest in their children’s activities. The teachers adopted different methods to involve the parents in day-to-day classroom and home activities. They used to send notes, invitation of parent-teacher meetings, invitation of parental guidance sessions and training sessions, continuously directing the parent’s attention towards their children. Patricia Brown Clark suggests that it is very important to keep the line of communication between teachers and parents open, so that the parents can interact with the teachers and get up to date information of their children’s school activities. One way to involve parents is to schedule school events and arranging classroom activities such as volunteering for libraries, acting as classroom aides or efficiently organizing lunch breaks. The teachers also opt for making phone calls at the children’s houses to keep in touch with the parents and getting to know the extent to which they are contributing towards the welfare of their children. Apart from the above activities, the teachers also assign home activities for both the parents and their children so that the parents remain indulged in their children and the children get to study at home. However, it was a bad and disappointing experience for the teachers when many of the parents failed to respond as expected. Many of the parents were so overwhelmed with their official work that they could hardly take out some time for their beloved children.

Moreover, for some parents their schoolings were not positive and character-boosting experiences, therefore they preferred to keep a distance from their children’s school as well. This made it really difficult and at times impossible for teachers to bring the parental involvement to the desired level. Nevertheless, the activities of two teachers proved greatly fruitful in making parents involved in their children. They were Carlos Valdez, an art teacher and 8th grade class sponsor, and Mike Hogan, the school’s band director. They did it by involving parents in music festivals and other school ceremonies. They proved to be great examples for the future teachers to come.

If the children’s academic development programs are to prove successful they must share two characteristics:

1) Developmentally appropriate practice:

A child’s academic progress is clearly reflected by the appropriate practice he/she administers while in school life. During transitions from pre-school to kindergarten, a child if given the exact developmentally appropriate practice tends to learn a great deal of language and playing skills. He develops a keen interest in exploring his environments and interacting (without hesitation) with his adults.

2) Supportive services:

These include the assistance that the school provides to low-income family students. The services include health care, childcare and community care. This strengthens the relation between school and children and creates a sense of security and confidence among the children. They get to learn that their communities are a part of their school since the school’s supportive services strive to help community development.

It is commonly believed that children are good self-teachers. Their self-initiated strategies help improve their expression, creativity, intellectual capabilities and extra-curricular skills. This idea is proved by the documentation of young children’s work provided by Reggio Emilia :

“The Reggio Emilia educators highlight young children’s amazing capabilities and indicate that it is through the unity of thinking and feeling that young children can explore their world, represent their ideas, and communicate with others at their highest level.”(Edwards, Pope. C, Springate, Wright.K)

The climax rests in the fact that how the parents would know that their sincere involvements are really proving worthwhile for their children. The answer lies in the attitude of the children. The degree of parental involvement can be judged by a child’s attitude towards his school subjects, his academic desires and achievements. There is a direct relationship between academic achievements and the attitude towards school. Schunk in 1981 had the following idea of aspiration or academic desires:

“Level of aspiration is defined as one’s subjective probability that he or she will reach a certain level of education.”(Abu, H. & Maher, M)

As a result children who received adequate parental concern were found to be much more confident in their academic desires and achievements than those who could not get the right amount of parental concern. The individual involvement of mothers and fathers also plays a vital role in the behavioral development of a child. Students from one-parent household were observed to show less positive attitude towards schools and studies as compared to students from two-parent households. One study aimed at investigating parental concern showed that despite mothers’ sincere endeavors, the role of fathers could not be ignored and both served as an important foundation for the future progress of the child. This can be proved from the following fact:

According to a recent report from the National Center for Educational Statistics (1997), compared to their counterparts, children with involved fathers are more likely to have participated in educational activities with their parents (e.g., to have visited a museum or a historical site with their parents in the past month), and are more likely to have access to multiple types of resources at home as well (as measured by the proportion of parents who belong to community or professional organizations, or regularly volunteer in the community). (Flouri, E. And Buchanan, A, Pg.142)

Also, the parental involvement has been discussed and implemented in terms of interventions or prevention programs, which are nothing but safety measures taken to assure healthy and perfect upbringing of the child. The study uses school-based and home-only intervention programs to find out the extent of intellectual capabilities found in children from different family backgrounds. The success of one school-based interventions can be proved from the following fact, which was a part of “Education Service Improvement Plan 2001-2005” of Edinburgh:

----The Scottish Executive Discipline Task Force, which studied the causes of poor behavior among pupils in schools produced a report of 'Better Behavior - Better Learning' in June 2001. The report included 36 recommendations for action, which were then turned into an Action Plan in 2002. Many of these have implications for the Education Authority. (Craig Millar Instep Project)



By: Alex Martin

About the Author:

The growth in magnitude of mono parents is rising steadily. Such a growth is witnessed not alone in US, but all other countries as well.

Parenting children all alone is an arduous and amenable job, considering the fact that raising children, companionless is an uphill task. This is why, gutsy and liable personalities vote for it.

In accordance with a public canvass conducted, when provided with an opportunity, a high margin of US population opted for parenting their children companionless, single handedly. This derives to a conclusion that, people aren’t destined to parent singly, but rather, it is an option willingly chosen by them.

Monetary Aid

Realizing the hardships of raising children solely and alone, the government renders financial backup to those indigent mono parents, thus minimizing their strain and endurance.

These government aids are available for the people of the society, specifically for indigent spouseless parents.

For mono parents seeking monetary help, to apply for the financial aid, should get hold of the document for appealing for the grant, from the City Hall in the vicinity. The answers for the queries should be inscribed and it ought to be legitimate as the data will be checked and will be the groundwork for accrediting their claim for the above mentioned.

Though these monetary grants are accessible by any mono parent, there are specifications and conditions for applying, to secure the capital from money minded clan.

Mono parents who get copious amount of amends and income, sufficient to assist the children at ease and even in a lavish manner, cannot avail the monetary help rendered by the administration.

Conditions Apply

To certify for the help extended by the regime, primarily, the mono parent’s marriage should have been annulled. Else, the other parent should have long ago kicked the bucket or is impaired or crippled.

The administration and professionals, assuming that financial parental aid, to the child, in such situations is impracticable, they offer financial parenting.

Further, considering that a period of 365 days is enough to sense relinquishment, a parent, singled out due to abjuring of the child by the other parent, is as well certified to apply for the aid.

Financial help is provided for single parents, when in a situation that the other parent being imprisoned or if the child is born to an unmarried couple.

Another instance, a swiftly escalating case, is when one of the parents, other than the parent who presently guards the child, is unidentified.

Children and parents singly raising children, in the below criteria, are unfit to aspire for monetary guidance or aid from the government.

- If because of the mono parent or both mom and dad, the child is a beneficiary for holdings or allowance.

- Auxiliary disability pension is obtainable by the mono parent for his affliction or due to him having children.

- Guardian or daycare takes over the charge of being a parent in disguise to the child.

- If the mono parent’s current companion takes care of the child. Couples united by common-law marriages come under this reservation.

- Public pension benefits can be obtainable by the mono parent who presently takes care of the child.

Though funds are provided for these mono parents, they ought to realize that, more than money, the care and emotional back up is more vital and superior to any aid rendered by the regime of the country the indigent mono parents.



By: Abhishek Agarwal

About the Author:

Although most parents would agree that their children are more important than their job, most usually get more on-the-job training than they do as a parent. As a Mother of seven once said, "The love is instinctual but the skills are not."

A NATIONAL MOVEMENT

A 1990 study by fifteen of the nation's largest youth organizations found that the United States has done poorly in solving the problems affecting today's youth. There was broad agreement that the number-one solution to these problems was . . . better parents. As a result of their findings, the final report calls for a massive increase in parent education.

President Bush then released a statement of six national goals for education. The number-one goal states that "by the year 2000, all children in America will start school ready to learn." To attain this goal "parents will have access to the training and support they need."

President Bush's comments represent a movement in thinking which places more value on the importance of a parent's role in preparing children for school and life. It is encouraging to see that there is a growing awareness that families need support and education . . . in order to strengthen parents' skills and prevent future problems.

SOCIETY HAS CHANGED

In the past, when parents had questions about child-rearing they would usually have an extended family member close by to ask advice. While some parents may have family close by, many admit that their elders' advice on child-rearing often differs from current parenting information or their preferred style. This is a result of changes in our society over the past few decades:

Children are no longer "needed" to work side by side with their parents, like farmers' children of the past. This helped children feel they had something important to contribute and taught them basic responsibility and life-management skills. Today, children search for ways to belong in the family and with peers, sometimes in unhealthy ways.

Superior/inferior family relationships are no longer being modeled by mothers and fathers. Women have equal rights and children feel equally unwilling to accept an inferior, ********** role in life. This change is healthy, in that all people do have a right to be treated with respect and dignity. It leaves many parents, however, with few role models or practical skills for achieving this goal.

Early on, children are being taught that they have rights: to their bodies, their feelings, and to be treated by others with dignity as a worthwhile human being.

As a result, power-and-control parenting techniques are no longer effective, because parents "talk down" to "inferior" children. This style, therefore, inherently violates a child's right to be treated with respect, children recognize this, rebel and lose respect for the controlling parent. As our society became more affluent, many parents became more permissive and over-indulgent. Their children often grew up thinking the world owed them a living and they used their energy trying to get out of responsibilities.

Children are facing issues previous generations never had to face. It is important for parents to listen and communicate in open, respectful ways, so their children will feel safe in discussing their problems and feelings.

Although some of these societal changes have brought about positive results, they have left parents with few clear guidelines for how to raise this new generation of children into responsible adults.

EFFECTIVE, QUALITY PARENT EDUCATION

What it Isn't . . .

Parent education does not focus on what parents are doing wrong or advocate never disciplining children, as many parents assume. It provides new options to parents and encourages them to respect their own rights, as well as their children's.

Attending a parenting class is not a reflection of being a "bad" parent . . . it is an indication of a parent's commitment to his/her children and role as a parent. The classes are not just for parents who are having severe problems with their children's behavior. Many parents who attend classes want to feel more confident of their parenting and are looking for ways to prevent future problems and help their family get along cooperatively.

What it Is . . .

The most effective parenting classes are small, personal groups which provide opportunities for interaction among parents, practice of concepts and techniques learned, and individualized problem solving. Like most new skills, parents can benefit from ongoing reinforcement of what they have learned. Follow-up parent discussion groups, where parents can meet with others who have taken the class, provide an opportunity to continue applying the concepts to new situations.

MAKING THE COMMITMENT

Although professionals often recommend parenting classes, there are several issues which seem to prevent parents from joining these groups: finding a class, making the time commitment, and cost. All three really boil down to the underlying issue of priorities. If a parent looks at how much time and money he/she spends on business seminars, golf lessons, weekly fast food, or vacations, it makes sense to place a priority on attending a parenting class, which usually costs less than all of these! Parenting classes are an investment in your personal growth, your child's future, and in future generations. Consider doing your part to make this world a better place for everyone's children. Read a parenting book that gives trustworthy, accurate advice or check out your community's resources for local parenting classes.





By: Jody Johnston Pawel, LSW, CFLE

About the Author:

The saying, "other people’s children" usually brings to mind how misbehaving other people’s children can be. "Other children’s parents" is a new saying that refers to how other people parent their children. Parents all have different expectations of their children and allow different behaviors.

When children begin to have friends, there are times parents would rather their child not associate with a certain child. Some parents let their children run wild, whereas some parents are completely strict. Parents have to learn to accept how other children are raised and teach their children to continue to respect their limits.

One common mistake made by parents is thinking that their parenting techniques are the best parenting techniques. Frequently parents may want to allow another child to disobey his or her parents, because they don’t think that another child’s parents’ decision is right. For example, some parents don’t allow their children to drink soda or eat sugary items. Offering these items to this child will compromise his or her parents’ ability to hold their child accountable. When parents respect other parents’ rules and parenting techniques they not only show respect to the other parents, but they model respect for others to their children.

Children who are considered wild and unruly can be more difficult to deal with for a parent. Parents can not control another person’s child when there are bad decisions being made by the child or the child’s parents. For example, if a phone call keeps coming in at 10 pm, but the rules clearly state no phone calls can be received after 9 pm, the child calling can be asked not to call again after 9pm, but if it persists parenting becomes difficult. There are two options available then for the parents. The first is to call the other child’s parents and ask them to talk to their child. If that doesn’t work, the only recourse is to discuss the situation with their own child and help their child to understand why the behavior of the other child is not acceptable.

The Playhouse

Many times there is a particular house that all of the neighborhood kids enjoy spending time at. Some parents enjoy the company of all of the kids and some do not. There are some benefits to having neighborhood children at your house. One of these benefits is that you are able to keep an eye on your own children. Another is that you can get to know your children'’ friends well. Still another benefit is that your children will learn to enjoy your company and accept you being around their friends when they get older.

One of the drawbacks, though, to having so many children in your home is that there is often more mess. Your food bill may go up when more mouths eat snacks, there may not be a lot of down time in your home and you many not be able to get your children to help around the house as much.

Finding a balance of time with your children playing with their friends in your home and having downtime in your home can be very important. One option to keep that balance is to set up times their friends are allowed to come over. You can also discuss with the other parents a rotational cycle where all the children play at different houses on different days.

Food costs can be minimized by buying in bulk or buying inexpensive snacks such as popsicles or individual bags of chips. Another option is to let children create their own snack. Cool aid ice cubes or cookies from scratch are some fun items that can be made.

Being able to have the best of both worlds with your children at home and your children away from home is great. Discuss with other parents and find what works best for everyone.



By: David Riklan

About the Author: