How Busy Parents Can Help Their Busy Children Ease Back
You are probably like most parents. You love your children, but you cannot tend to their needs every single waking minute.
Sometimes you need a break from them, and sometimes you have very important responsibilities to take care of that sometimes require you be away from them for a short time. This can be very difficult if you have a child who is going through the “overly-clingy” stage.
Usually it is toddlers who are most needy, but this trait can carry on throughout the middle childhood years. The older the child is the more likely you will be able to hopefully help them become more independent.
Of course, the easiest way to help them not be too clingy when they are older is to ease them out of that stage during their infant and toddler years. For instance, when your baby is first born you may pick the child up quite often.
However, you will want to gradually increase the intervals of time in between holding your baby. As your child progresses through his or her toddler years, you will slowly decrease the amount of time that the child will be held, will sleep in your bed, will sit on your lap, and so on.
If you have started at a young age helping your child to become reasonably independent, the child will most likely be able to play on his or her own soon enough. You may still occasionally let the child sit on your lap, or may still come in your room on a stormy night once in awhile.
However, most likely by the child is about five years old the child will feel less of a need to be near you. This will free you with more time to take care of important business that requires full attention-even if it means momentarily taking your eyes off your child.
However, if your child is still a little clingy even after reaching school age, there is still time. Furthermore, you have no need to beat yourself up if you picked upon your infant and toddler every single time he or she cried.
The easiest way to remedy childhood clinginess is to encourage that child to pursue independent interests. For example, if you notice your child likes to draw or has an ear for music, encourage that.
Furthermore, you will want to allow your child to have contact with neighborhood children and classmates as much as possible. Another way to get a child off of you while you need to take care of important adult business is to hire a caretaker.
That person can assist your child even while you are home. You can also send the child with grandma or grandpa for a few hours.
There are also ways to help your child not feel neglected while you finish important tasks. You can give your child a hug, say “I love you,” and find a way to keep the child occupied. The child can watch a movie, play an educational video game, or even read a book.
Of course, you will want to still enough time with your child so the child does continually feel loved. You can plan weekend family events, and you can read the child a story before bedtime.
However, there is no need to feel guilty if you need to separate yourself while you do the laundry, figure out the checkbook, or complete a work task. It is even “okay” to allow some quality time just for you to partake in hobby activities.
The smartest parents are the ones who set boundaries for themselves, and who recognize their limitations. It is okay to not be everything for your child all the time-just as often as you are able.
